


He'll Never Love You Like I Could

by orphan_account



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band), Halsey
Genre: Abuse, Alcohol, Drugs, F/F, F/M, High School, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-05
Updated: 2015-06-26
Packaged: 2018-04-02 23:02:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4077103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The story of a bisexual seventeen year-old girl who has trouble deciding who means the most to her, told primarily from the point of view of a sixteen year-old girl with flaming red hair and the tendency to suppress her feelings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

Ashley Frangipane awoke at six a.m. on a Monday morning in September with a start, immediately feeling a pounding in her head that could only be the result of the extensive amount of partying that she'd engaged in the night before. Her breath tasted like stale cigarettes and Red Bull, both of which she'd consumed copious amounts of at her best friend's gathering, and her brown hair was extremely disheveled. Those factors were usually indicators that her evening had been successful, not that she could ever really recall what had happened. Ashley was typically the type of person to black out when she was drunk, high, or both, so she was eternally grateful that she had her two best friends, Kendra and Ashton, to look after her when she was unable to look after herself.

The seventeen year-old sighed, sitting up and running her fingers through her hair in an attempt to disentangle it, and her eyes fell upon her aforementioned companions. Ashton had assumed his habitual position on the left side of her bed, but both of his shoes were still on and he was atop her royal blue comforter instead of under it, meaning that he'd either fallen asleep directly after getting Ashley into bed safely or he'd been slightly drunk himself.

Ashley was betting on the latter.

Kendra was sprawled across three different beanbags that lined the wall opposite of Ashley's bed since her 5'10 frame was unable to be satisfied by just one or even two. Ashley always encouraged her to sleep with her and Ashton. After all, it _was_ a king-sized mattress that would undoubtedly provide more than enough space for the compeers, but Kendra had always denied her offers, much to her confusion. Ashley herself found absolutely nothing appealing about sleeping on flattening beanbags that had been in the same location on the same wooden floor for years, but Kendra seemed perfectly content with it.

 _Fuckin' weirdo_ , Ashley thought, a giggle escaping her lips that caused the thumping in her skull to intensify. She slightly winced, but a fond grin remained.

She loved her anyway.


	2. Colors

_Everything is blue -_

_his pills, his hands, his jeans -_

_and now i'm covered in the colors,_

_pulled apart at the seams._

Ashley's raspy voice accompanied by an acoustic guitar roused Kendra from her slumber, and the red-haired girl groaned as she stretched, feeling the tension in her muscles only slightly dissipate as she did so. She was familiar with the song that graced her ears, for her best friend had been in the process of writing it for nearly two months. Every time Kendra slept at Ashley's, she was awakened by it, which wasn't remotely close to being a bad thing. Ash called it _Colors_ , a fact that the sixteen year-old wasn't surprised by. She'd always been obsessed with different hues, and she could name well over one hundred of them. It was a strange quirk that everyone was fascinated by. The reason why she was infatuated with every tone known to man was a concept that no one could grasp. It was questionable whether or not Ashley herself even knew. However, it was intriguing to hear the strange names of colors that would often escape Ashley's mouth ( _cyan, azure, bisque..._ ).

_Everything is grey -_

_his hair, his smoke, his dreams -_

_and now he's so devoid of color,_

_he don't know what it means,_

_and he's blue,_

_and he's blue._

"You finally wrote a new part?" a voice sounded from the doorway. Ashton was leaning against the door-frame, spooning Lucky Charms from a large black bowl and studying Ashley carefully as she jotted something down in the orange songbook that she carried with her everywhere.

"You finally stopped eating that disgusting ass slop that you call food?" Kendra piped up, yawning and grinning at the boy across the room from her. She and Ashley had both theorized a few years prior that Ashton enjoyed staying overnight at her house simply because there was always oatmeal in the pantry. The very fact that her kitchen was always stocked with the revolting breakfast item was a mystery, because no one in her family ever ate it. Kendra believed that Ashley's mother had gotten so used to purchasing it for Ashton that it was a habit at this point.

"We're out, actually," Ashley said from her spot at her desk, brushing her hair out of her eyes and behind her ears as she continued to write whatever it was that had crossed her mind.

"Your mom's slipping, Ash. I almost cried at the thought of eating cereal this morning," Ashton replied, finishing his bowl and setting it on the floor so that Ashley's dog, Sebastian, could drink the milk from it when he got back from his morning walk with Sevian, Ashley's brother. "It's not that bad, Kenny," he continued, sending a pointed look towards Kendra. "You should give it a chance. You'll never know if you like something unless you try it out."

Kendra glared at Ashton, because she just _knew_ what he was getting at. For the past several weeks, the hazel-eyed boy had been attempting to get the ginger to make a move on Ashley (or anyone, for that matter). Kendra, an open pansexual, hadn't been in a relationship in over a year, which Ashton considered to be an atrocity.

_You're a pretty girl, Ken. Anyone would be lucky to have you,_ he'd said the night before while the pair attempted to get Ashley into her bed without breaking any of her limbs or accidentally waking her, because neither would have produced even a semi-positive result.

"Ashton, it's seven thirty in the morning, therefore it's far too early for you to be giving me a pep talk...or whatever it is that you're trying and failing to do," Kendra answered through half-gritted teeth, throwing a glare in his direction and dodging the topic that he'd alluded to. The redhead wasn't prepared to have that specific conversation in front of Ashley on a Monday morning, especially since all three of them were nursing hangovers of different intensities.

"Besides," she persisted. "Shouldn't we be getting to school?"

☆☆☆

"Travis just texted me," Ashley announced as Ashton sped down the highway on their way to Brooklyn Senior High School, causing Kendra to let out a long, exasperated sigh and Ashton's entire body to tense. Travis Hitchcock was one of Ashley's ex-boyfriends and, by far, the worst. The two had met at a house party during their freshman year, when they were both tripping on LSD, and Ashley seemed to fall in love on the spot. Over the course of three months, Ashley managed to fail six classes and she gained about a thousand bruises as a result of Travis's heavy hand. It was when she showed up at Ashton's apartment in late November, bloody and sobbing, that he and Kendra, who had been lounging in front of the complex when she arrived, decided to tell the authorities, landing Travis in a juvenile detention center on the south side of New York.

"He out of juvie?" Ashton asked, knowing the answer of his query already but hoping that his best friend would laugh and say that it was just a joke.

"He invited the three of us to his house on Friday to celebrate the fact that he was let out on probation," she answered, voice tight with anticipation. "He doesn't know that you were the ones who turned him in, so it's not like he'll be beating the shit out of you or anything."

"You don't know that," Kendra countered, bitterness slicing each word she spoke like a switchblade in a street fight. "He hit _you_ for no reason whatsoever. What makes me or Ashton any different? After all, we mean less to him than you did."

To say that Kendra was angry would be an understatement. She was absolutely _seething_ at the idea of that piece of trash even considering speaking to her Ashley after all of the physical and emotional trauma that he'd put her through.

"Look, Kenny," Ashley began as Ashton pulled into the parking lot. The brunette sighed and rolled down her window, throwing out her cigarette butt before speaking again. "I'm not saying that you should forgive him. Hell, I haven't even forgiven him. I just feel like it'll be a kick-ass party. It doesn't really matter to me who's throwing it. There will be free booze, free drugs, free food, and free music. Take those things into consideration and nothing else. What do you say?"

Kendra and Ashton exchanged a look through the rear-view mirror as he maneuvered into his usual parking space. Although they knew that Ashley wasn't telling them the entire truth, that there was more to her reasoning that she was letting on, they also knew that there was no point in arguing with the highly opinionated and stubborn seventeen year-old. She'd end up at that party, whether Ashton and Kendra accompanied her or not, so they both sighed in defeat, nodding and exiting the car in silence as Ashley typed out a quick message on her iPhone before joining them.


	3. Flashback

_For one a.m. on a late November evening in Brooklyn, New York, it was warm. The thermometer that was screwed into the brick wall near the entrance of Ashton's apartment building read 72 degrees Fahrenheit, so Kendra and the hazel-eyed boy were lounging outside in cheap lawn chairs that they'd purchased from the dollar store a few hours before. The pair had been in their respective positions for nearly four hours, spending their time by passing a bottle of vodka and a pack of Marlboros back and forth and discussing the generalities of life._

_Kendra_ _always saw it as a blessing that she had Ashley and Ashton as friends, because everything was just so_ **_easy_ ** _with the two of them. Sure, Ashley had an abnormal obsession with colors, and Ashton watched a colossal amount of Family Guy, but those were minuscule things in Kendra's eyes. After all, she herself spent too much time overthinking and philosophizing for her own good, and they always put up with_ **_her_ ** _. Kendra loved the odd quirks to her friends, and they felt the same way about her, which left her feeling grateful that she had them in her life. It seemed that, no matter what she said or did, both Ashley and Ashton remained constants - being shoulders to cry on, ears to talk into, or just presences to make Kendra feel cared for and loved - and she made sure to reciprocate when necessary. It was a system that had worked since the three of them first became friends in seventh grade, so Kendra found herself handing her yellow lighter to Ashton before speaking in as serious of a tone that she could muster up while intoxicated._

_"I think that I wanna break up with Nathan," she began, enunciating her words carefully and casting her green eyes sideways so that they met with Ashton's greenish-brown ones._

_Nathan_ _Davis was Kendra's boyfriend of over two years, and they'd always seemed like the perfect couple, causing Ashton to be confused at the ginger's sudden declaration. The duo had been a couple for longer than Ashton and Kendra had even been friends, so it was almost hard to hear 'Nathan Davis' without thinking of 'Kendra Curtiss', and vice versa._

_"Why? You and Nate - Shit, Kenny. Tell me that that's not Ash."_

_Bewildered at Ashton's remarkably sudden shift in manner, Kendra turned to face the direction in which he was staring with wide eyes. Sure enough, there was Ashley Nicolette Frangipane, or a shell of a person that resembled her, at least. Her brown hair was pulled up into a messy bun, and tears were streaming down her face, but that wasn't what worried Kendra the most. Ashley was sporting two black eyes and, although she was holding it, the redhead could see that her nose was bleeding profusely. A cut split her left eyebrow in half and there were various bruises littering Ashley's exposed arms and legs. Kendra immediately sobered at the sight, and her drunkenness was replaced with nausea. She felt hungover - like it was the morning after she'd blacked out due to consuming an unhealthy amount of alcohol. Her stomach lurched as both she and Ashton stood up and made their way over to their friend._

_"Ash, baby, look at me," Kendra said, voice wavering with anger and sadness as she continued to observe Ashley's physical state. Ashley complied, her hazel eyes welling up with more tears as they met Kendra's._

_"Did Travis - " Ashton started, hooking arms with the brunette and helping her walk through the threshold that led to the main stairwell of Vanmew Apartments. "Did Travis do this to you?"_

_"I'm sorry," Ashley cried, and Kendra felt her heartstrings rip. Ashton unlocked his living room door and the three of them padded across the floor to the bathroom, where the dirty blond and the ginger lowered the brunette onto the edge of the bathtub._

_"Don't apologize to us, Ash," Kendra soothed, assisting Ashton in gathering first aid supplies and cloths in order to clean Ashley's injuries as well as possible, although Kendra mentally noted that the fifteen year-old's inner wounds would be much more difficult to patch up. "You have_ **_nothing_ ** _to be sorry for."_

_"But I said -" Ashley protested, wincing as Kendra poured rubbing alcohol over the laceration on her brow and applied gauze and medical tape to it. "I said that he was being a dick to me, and I shouldn't have said that. I should have known. I had no right to say that to him."_

_"Sweetie, listen to Kenny," Ashton insisted, lightly holding fabric to her nose to aid in stopping the bleeding. "I don't care what you said. It doesn't matter what you said. He had no right to lay a finger on you."_

_Ashton allowed his gaze to reach Kendra's for the first time since before he'd seen Ashley stumbling towards the two of them, and she could see the message that he was attempting to convey through them: 'I'm gonna fucking kill him.'_

_"I don't think that anything is broken," Kendra assessed, biting her lip and caressing the side of Ashley's face. "You're lucky."_

_"You're staying here tonight," Ashton added, pulling the rag back to check on the state of Ashley's nosebleed. It'd stopped._

_"Thank you," Ashley whispered hoarsely, pressing her forehead to Ashton's and gripping Kendra's hand. "I love you guys. I really do."_

☆☆☆

_"Travis Hitchcock has a death wish," Ashton snarled, pacing back and forth in his kitchen while Kendra watched from her location atop the counter next to the sink. The two had laid Ashley in Ashton's bed nearly twenty minutes prior, but the boy made certain not to have an outburst until he was sure that she was asleep. "He is_ **_so_ ** _lucky to have Ash as a girlfriend. She didn't deserve that. I don't care what she thinks. She didn't fucking deserve that."_

_"We should call the cops and let them know that he's a physical and emotional threat to her," Kendra vocalized, although she felt the urge to inflict bodily harm upon the bastard just as much as Ashton did. She'd already ran through the options in her head, and she decided that, although Ashley would undoubtedly be angered by any measure that resulted in Travis being reprimanded for his actions, alerting the authorities and taking the high road was their best choice._

_"I should drive by his place and let him know that tonight's going to be his last night on earth," Ashton snapped back, earning an eye roll from his best friend._

_"Ashton, I want to beat his ass, too. Believe me," Kendra replied, reaching out to grab his arm and stopping his movements altogether. "We'll call the station in the morning, present our evidence, that piece of shit will get locked up, and we'll never have to hear from him again. We need to be there for Ashley, and, for some totally fucked up reason, she's attached to him. She's still hopelessly in love with Travis, and fighting him will only hurt our friendship with her. Yeah, she's gonna be mad that we turned him in, but we'll have the chance to support her in her healing process and let her know that, despite the beliefs that roam that head of hers, she doesn't deserve what he did to her tonight."_

_"Why can't we kick the living shit out of Travis and_ **_then_ ** _be there for Ash?"_

_"It's a little hard to be a perpetual source of comfort for someone when you're in jail," Kendra answered, hopping off of the counter and stretching._

_"Where are you going?" Ashton questioned, raising an eyebrow at the redhead in front of him._

_"I was gonna catch the bus and go home?" she responded questioningly, tilting her head and snorting in incertitude._

_"Nuh-uh," Ashton spurned. "It's three a.m. I live in Central Brooklyn. There are weirdos on that bus, so you're not getting on it. C'mon. We'll take the couch and give Ash a little bit of peace for once."_

_"You're such a good friend," Kendra cooed, laughing as she strode into the living room._

_"You know it."_


End file.
